Guys we can finally admit it…

We have no sense of direction.

I guess I'm not the only one in this situation. For years I've had to fake being good at reading maps, pretend I don't need to ask the way, explain why a 20 minute journey has stretched to an hour and a half, swear blind that the junction I took was the right one so they must have changed the roads overnight. But never, ever, could I admit to another bloke that I had no sense of direction.

Well that's all changed. SatNav is the gadget of choice of just about every bloke-ish bloke I know. And don't we just love it. We never get lost. We arrive on time. We don't get stressed. Instead…

"Journey ok? Found us alright?"

"Sure did. SatNav got me right here. I love it."

"Great isn't it. I've got a NavMan 510. Would be lost without it… lol lol"

"Voice any good?

"Lisps a bit. Got it set to the female voice. How's yours?"

"Not tried the NavMan. I've got a [insert model of choice]"

"Any good on post codes?"

"Updates automatically over the phone."

"Wow, that's good…"

And so on…

And beyond this most unblokeish instant conversation, the whole experience of travelling by car is so much better. No blazing rows on the motorway with an apologetic partner alongside raising eyebrows and saying, "Well I did wonder if we should have taken that turn that said 'restricted traffic only'". No getting lost and ending up at a toll booth and waiting for the police to allow you to reverse out via a service road. No missing the motorway and taking the longest short-cut on the planet.

Instead…

Just get in and drive. Wrong turning? No problem, just keep going and get re-routed instantly back on track.

Truly a life-changing experience.

Do I like my NavMan? I'd be lost without it.

This Post Has 6 Comments

  1. mjmsprt40

    23 Jul 2005

    And all this time I've been doing it the hard way. Map books and following directions given over the phone have been how I made my bread and cheese since 1987. These days, I have the Rand-McNally Chicagoland Atlas and Delorme's U.S. map on my laptop. No GPS, though. It would be almost impossible to follow over any distance because the laptop would shut down before I got there.

  2. paulette2004

    23 Jul 2005

    My ex always navigated – ususally banned from driving – and we've had some amazing journeys through places that were nowhere near where we wanted to go! At last a man has had the courage and guts to say what we women have always thought – they don't know where they're going!!!! My car's computer talks to me – bloody irritating voice like Margaret Thatcher in full Nanny mode – so if anyone knows how to switch the damn thing off I'd love to hear from you, love Letty

  3. Scouser

    23 Jul 2005

    I find the best way to get to where you want to go is to wind the window down and ask someone – in the strongest Scouse accent you can muster!

    'Eh, mate! Wairz de Brritish Myoozeum, laikh, lar?'

    They usually stop and try to work out what planet you came from, and that generally gives you plenty of time to change to a RP accent and ask them the question again, by which time you have their undivided attention.

    This works really well in London, but not in Liverpool, where they understand you immediately, take no notice, and end up stealing your hub caps and car radio because you are in a stationary vehicle. You'd be better off keeping on the move if you try this in Liverpool. Don't worry, if you pick the right scallies, they'll run after the car, thus increasing your chances of getting the answer to your question!

  4. Words

    23 Jul 2005

    LOL!

    Of course you can always set the SatNav to avoid Liverpool completely 😉

  5. Words

    23 Jul 2005

    You're missing out. Plug the SatNav into the cigarette lighter and it charges up on the go…

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